Thursday, August 23, 2012

If I had a nickel...

for every time I get asked:

  • How's your adoption going? 
I would be rich.  The question, however well meaning, is inaccurate - I'm fostering!

Then again, if I got a nickel lately for every time lately I've been asked:
  • When are you getting your first foster child?
I would still be rich!

It's honestly been a question I needed to address here but I've been dragging my feet.  Hurry up and wait is the name of the game these days.

I was so confident at the beginning of July.  I had just finished my second home study and been told that my file would be 1 week at the local office and then sent off to the Children's Network, where it would be another 3ish weeks.   That put me at getting my license early to mid-August, easily.  Since I had a trip to Kenya (leaving tomorrow!) I was confident telling people I would get my first child in early September.  

I should have known better.  You always hear the stories about it taking forever, delays, unexpected paperwork, lost paperwork, expired paperwork - but you listen to the stories from those who it took a month from home study to placement.   You hope and you make a timeline - one that makes sense, one that works for you.  

But life is messy.  And God's timing is very different than my own.  Right now I am sitting at 7 (seven!) weeks of my file being at the local office.  Even if it is sent early next week, I'm still looking at least another month.  

So now I have some decisions to make.  Because it's not neat and tidy in my mind anymore.  Here are the points I'm pondering:
  • I have a conference at the end of October and I had originally thought taking a child with me would be doable, but because of short timing and a few international stops it's not a possibility.  I don't want to get a child and then turn around just a week or two later and leave them for a week.
  • Rachel's wedding in Indiana at Thanksgiving time.  I will be going regardless.  Will I have enough time to get it squared away for me to take a child with me?  Will I need to get respite care instead?
  • Christmas.  Hopefully less of an issue.  I will hopefully have enough time to square all of this away.
A few days ago I was sure that the decision would be to wait until after the New Year to begin.  Then, a few discussions later, maybe after the October conference.  Some have suggested that I do respite care  (giving care for foster kids when other foster parents need to travel or a break) until the conference or until the end of the year.  I'm mixed on that right now.  A huge part of me just wants to start.  For real start.  Not a few days in and a few days out.  But there is a need.  

So I have a lot to pray about and I also just have to wait and see when my license actually comes.  

So the answer to the question of when is I don't know.  At the end of last week I had quite a few frustrated tears over this.  But as for today,  I wait and pray, knowing God's timing is perfect - though I often wish He would let me borrow His watch!   Now, with some perspective, I am thankful for a little more time to prepare.  God is good.

Tomorrow I leave for Kenya to love on some kids.  I'm praying that my home is in one piece when I return (please be nice, Hurricane Isaac).   

After that, who knows?!  I'll keep you all posted.

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